This Is How You Turn Slutty Halloween Costumes, Into A Sports Related Blog!

Halloween is almost here, and I have to honestly admit, that ever since I was told I am too old to go out trick or treating (about two years ago), I have lost my love for the spooky day. So needless to say, I don't get into the whole dressing up for Halloween parties deal.

I am an old fashioned man, I like my liqour mixed with water, my video games played on the 8-bit, and my Halloween costumes slutty, be it on guys or girls.

So in honor of my least favorite holiday, we are going to see if we can make me like Halloween, by exploring the sluttiest sports costumes on the Internet.

Sexy Adult Boxer

So here we have the sexy boxer. All I have to say is I would love to go twelve rounds with her. If I see a girl in this costume at the party I am going to, she will have the pleasure of turning me down, before she even gets her first drink in her.

6 Evander Holyfield Ears out of 10


Sexy Referee

Five minute major for hotness. This costume has a lot of super powers that come with it. If I am at a party, and this girl blows her whistle, and says "You, go make me a drink, then fill my car up with gas, get my boyfriend a drink and go call that girl in the boxer outfit a slut!!" I will do it. That's a super power right?

8 Blown Calls out of 10

Sexy Nascar Lady

Varooooom! This outfit is nice. I like the checkered flag, but I am not really into the whole Nascar deal.

5 Cole Trickles out of 10


Sexy Golf

FORE! If I see this girl at the party, my first question would be "Excuse me miss, I seem to have lost my balls, can you help me find them?" To which she would answer with "Get the hell away from me you drunk creep!" Which would lead me to say "Talk about a hole in one!"

7 Meesta Meesta Ladies out of 10

Sexy Football

Hut Hut Hut! I would love to have this girl snapping the ball to me, there would be no shotgun formations, and the drive would eventually end up in a safety, every time, due to me running out the clock, on every play, possibly leading to one or two hard counts.

8 Brett Favre Soft Cacks out of 10

Sexy Baseball

Batter Up!!! I love baseball, and I love this costume. All though I highly question whether she could beat out a bunt with those boots.

9 Sammy Sosa Corked Bats out of 10

So what am I going to dress up as this weekend? My costume making process begins this Saturday, during our Super Special Halloween Edition of Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast, recorded in front of a live studio audience, and by the time the show is done, my costume will be complete. .......... that costume being............ Black Out Drunk Gary!

What else is coming up on this weeks Podcast you ask? Good question.

- A jets fan making love to his tenants dog..... twice.

- Real life athletes apologizing for their video game counter parts sucking

- The plot holes and paradoxes of the Back To The Future trilogy

- Inventive NFL Wives Start Anti-Cheating Club

 - Baseball Playoffs, Week 7 in the NFL, and NHL talk.

All that, and much much more! Be sure to check it out.

http://kyleandgary.podbean.com/

 Want to join the Face book blog party fan page? You are in luck, click on the Jack Handy-esque wannabe below.

Have a great Halloween Everyone! Ride Trojan Horse, Ride!!

Happy Birthday Nintendo!! Let's Celebrate!!

Monday October 18th was a very special day for me, and for all of you as well. No, it was not the Anniversary of the first time I ever made love to a women, (still waiting for that magical moment!!), no, on that day, the greatest video gaming system of all time was born.

Yes, the Nintendo Entertainment System was released to the masses 25 years ago, Monday, and I will never forget that magical Christmas morning when the Nickel family was blessed by the guy upstairs, that's right, Santa Claus!

All day long, we played Super Mario Bothers, Elevator Action, Ice Hockey and Mike Tyson's Punch Out. I honestly remember my two older brothers being dicks, not letting me play, so I sat upstairs, on the couch crying for about 3 hours, trying to figure out why no one was asking me what's wrong.......... My brothers are dicks!! That's whats wrong! I was 6 or 7, so these actions were sort of understandable.

But enough about me and my sob stories about being the youngest brother, the reason we are here today is to celebrate the 8-bit awesomeness that is the NES. I decided to do this by giving you a list of my top 5 favorite Nintendo sports games of all time, let's go ahead and name the list "Gary's Top Five List Of Sports Games For The NES That He Loved The Most, And Never Lost At, Because He Is Awesome!"

Let's get it on!

5. Baseball Stars

You were a huge nerd if you loved this game. It was the first one I can remember that involved player development, a franchise mode, with salaries, and the ability to build your team around either pitching, fielding, speed, or hitting.


For game play video click, this picture!

4. Dusty Diamonds All Star Softball

I grew up with this game, it was sooo simple, but sooo fun, I still play it at my buddy Big Boi's house, and I am proud to say, I haven't lost in a long time.

You can pick from 6 different fields to play on, ranging from the Park, the School, the Cliff, the Sandlot, the Island, and the Professional stadium. The true awesomeness of this game lies in the players. You pick your team from a big group of misfits, player by player, ranging from normal looking fellas, to witches, coal miners, and even the devil himself.

Gary's tip : Mikey is the shit, put him in right field with his rocket arm, Diablo hits jacks, while, Flip and Rocky are the top two pitchers.


For some hot baseball action, click the game play pic below!

3. Ice Hockey

I got this game with my first NES. Played it all the time. 4 on 4 hockey, international teams, pick skinny, medium, or fat players, logically, fat guy = big booming shot, skinny guy = serious speed, medium guy is average at both.

The rumors are true. I did beat Peter Trumpy while playing a full period blindfolded, no big deal.




Gary's tip - Take two fat guys, 1 skinny, 1 medium, and of course, always play with Canada. There was also a bouncy boards code that I used to know, but now I forgot, if anyone out there in Internet land knows the code, please let me know.

To see some gnarly hockey action, click the game play screen!

2. Mike Tyson's Punch Out

I got this game with my Nintendo as well, that magical Christmas of '87. Spent many hours trying to be as good as my brothers, I never did get that good, but this game was so fun to play, and it was the godfather to the incredible Fight Night franchise.


Your name is Little Mac, you and your trainer Doc Louis start out in the minor circuit , then try to climb your way to the Dream Bout with Iron Mike Tyson (Who is so big, he takes up 2 thirds of the screen.) You gotta defeat a lot of wild opponents on your road to the top, including my favorites, Glass Joe, King Hippo, Don Flamenco, Piston Honda, Bald Bull, Mr. Sandman, and Super Macho Man.

Gary's Tip - When your in-between rounds, hammer on the select button to boost your power back up, as well, you think your the best?? Face the champ, here's the code - 007 373 5963.
You wanna see the champ, click the sexy winking, flexing Tyson!



1. Tecmo Super Bowl

This game was the sequel to the groundbreaking original, Tecmo Bowl. It was the first to use real teams and real player names. Super Bowl was better because every team was used and instead of 4 plays to choose from, Super had 8.


So this game is just so freaking awesome, real players, real teams, season mode, everything a young nerd like myself could ever want in a video game. If you haven't played it yet, please find a way to do it before you die, you will be a better human because of it. I can't really explain it any better, number one, enough said.

Gary's Tip - If you like to run, take the Raiders, Bo Jackson is unstoppable. If you like to pass, Warren Moon and his Houston Oilers are probably your best bet. As far as defence goes Lawrence "don't smoke crack!" Taylor and the Giants are about as good as it gets.

First off, the greatest video game commercial of all time click on the playbook to the left!

For game play video, click that sexy game play pic to the right!









So there you go, that's the list, I hope ya'll enjoyed it, and Happy 25th Nintendo.

Kyle And Gary's Super Awesome Podcast!!!

http://kyleandgary.podbean.com/

Coming up on this week's episode:

- The same as last week, due to drunken technical difficulties, last weeks show never really turned out, so now we have to make show 6 DOUBLE AWESOME, and we will, don't you worry those purdy little faces.

Want to join the face book party that doesn't quit, click on this  handsome man!

Have a great weekend everyone, and play some 8-bit will ya, it's good for the soul!

Enter....................... The Trojan Horse!!!!

Some MLB (Cue Jim Mora Voice) Playoffs!! Playoffs??? You Talking About Playoffs?? Predictions

Baseball Playoffs have moved to the LCS's, as in League Championship Series. I decided to celebrate by getting together a nifty little round table, full of all the stars that make this blog go round,  to make some predictions.

Without further adieu, I give you "Gary's All Star Round Table, MLB Predictions Edition!!!"

Gary Nickel:

NLCS - It's gots to be the Phils right? So I am taking Uncle Phil over the Giant Gonazalezes, in 4.

                         VS

MVP award will go to my boy Ryan Howard.

ALCS - I'm taking the Walker Texas Rangers over the Evil Emperors in 6.

                                VS
                                                




MVP award will go to my boy Vlade the Impaler.

World Series - I like the Uncle Phils in 6, and I hate Chuck Norris, he couldn't even carry Steven Seagal's jock strap.

MVP - Doc Brown.

Ryan Mazzei: AKA Blogatron, AKA The Maestro of Bloganomics!

Dr. No vs. The Freak - If Baseball had negative numbers than I'd go that route.  Goose-eggs would litter the board one would predict, but not I.  Runs will be scored and scored early, then come to an end when these two settle in.

Look for Halladay to go the distance and Timmy a solid 7 1/3.  3-2 after 4, then no score until the Phillies score two off the temp set up man Ramon Ramirez to give Ramirez his 2nd loss.

Brian Wilson won't be used.  Look for 11 K from The Freak and 1 per inning from Dr.No.  Halladay will give up an early inning Jack to Pablo Sandoval (likely with 1 out and 1 on in the 2nd).  So the game of the decade will be one for the ages (if you like doubling up game descriptions).

As for my predictions in general.

Phillies in 6. Rangers in 7.  Phillies in 5, honorable mention to a no decision battle between Halladay and Cliff Lee, with the Phillies taking the game.

MVP - Roy Halladay - 4 appearances, 3 wins, 1 No hitter - 1 Legend is confirmed.

Jason Mazzei:: AKA The Prime Minister Of Blogatronics!

AL: Rangers vs Yanks.

Rangers will be in tough.  Cliff Lee isn't starting until game 3 and will only pitch one other game as he has never pitched on 3 days rest.  The Yanks have a stacked staff, a stacked line-up and a stacked bullpen.  Baseball isn't fair.

AJ Burnett can start game 4 and pitch from the pen.  CC looks good, Hughes is a stud and Petitte looks revived.  But cheering for the Yanks is like hoping Donald Trump makes more money, Danny Almonte pitches a perfect game in Little League at age 23, or Mainway Mazda wins another CUC hockey league title.  You are a douche bag if you cheer for any of them.

So Andy P will get lit up and finally retire, CC will choke on his cheeseburger, Cliff Lee will dominate Game 3 and AJ will serve up 2 jacks to Ian Kinsler.  Ron Washington will win by stealing at will off Posada.

Rangers in 6.  Ian Kinsler NLCS MVP.

Look for the Blog assistant to break a few Rhino bats after Cliff Lee signs with the Yanks for 126 mill for 6 years in December.

NL: Phillies vs Giants

Game 1 Halladay v Lincecum
Game 2 Hamels v Sanchez
Game 3 Oswalt v Cain

This could be the best pitching match ups in recent memory.  The Phillies only have 10 pitchers on their 25 man roster.  They need their starters to bring it.  They will.

The Giants have such a good staff and bullpen, they have the highest paid cheerleader in Barry Zito (who looks alot like the Maestro of Bloganomics) sitting on the bench and not on the active roster.

The difference here is the offense.  The Giants simply can't match up with Howard, Werth, Victorino, Utley, Rollins etc.

Phillies in 5.  NLCS Co-MVP's Roy Halladay with 2 wins and an ERA of .87 and Jayson Werth playing for a big contract.


World Series.  Phillies over Rangers

Roy gets his ring, another MVP and gives a shout out to T.O., Gary Nickel and the rest of the Blue Jay super fans for their support.


Scott Anderson from Scott's Sexy Picks of the Week:

AL winner: Texas in 7 (Kinsler)
NL winner: Philly in 5 (Utley)

WS: Philly in 5 (Doc)

Just Like Scott in the bedroom, short and sweet.

Gerald Bauman from Newstalk Radio Fame:

National League:

Philadelphia in 5 games

MVP: Jayson Werth

American League:

Texas in 7 games

MVP: Micheal Young

He is on the record, let's see how everyone does.

KYLE AND GARY'S SUPER AWESOME PODCAST

Coming up on this week's podcast:

We talk about Justin Bieber ripping on Tom Brady, MLB Playoffs, Trannys getting no love from the LPGA, NHL News, another 4 minute vodka challenge, and much much more!

http://kyleandgary.podbean.com/

Want to join the Face Book cool people only club, click the face of radicality

The Trojan Horse is back bitches! See ya'll next week.

Patriots Say Bye Bye Playoffs, While The Big Moss Man Saves The Vikings!

Randy Moss has been one of "My Guys" since he was taken out of Marshall with the 21st pick of the 1998 NFL Draft. He was brash, he was funny, he was sassy, and most of all, he could flat out play!

He came out of College with a chip on his shoulder, ready to show all the teams that passed on him, that they made a mistake by not taking him earlier..... and then he proved it on the field.

He also performed one of the greatest touchdown celebrations this side of the Icky Shuffle, that's right, I am talking about the Lambeau Moon Job.

Click here to see the play, and hear Joe Buck sound like a little bitch

So with the announcement of Randy finally being freed from the New England Correctional Center, aka the Patriots Franchise, I thought I would give you a quick rundown of how we got to this.

Randy made an impact as a rookie that few other players have been able to do. He was a big part of that record breaking offence in Minnesota that put up 556 points, the most ever in NFL history, and never looked back.

Click the here to see the  Greatest Rookie Season in the history of the NFL

Eventually, the Vikings grew tired of Randy and shipped him off to the black hole in Oakland, where he did nothing but collect a paycheck for 2 years.

Randy being Randy! This picture sums up Moss's time in Oakland.

Then, the ground roots were set for the deal that went down this week. Brett Favre did everything he possibly could to persuade the Packers to bring Moss back to the home of the Lambeau Moon Job, but it wasn't ment to be, so the Patriots ripped off the Raiders, and sent a fourth round pick for the Big Moss Man.

This is what Favre Wanted back in '07, now he has it, and he will like it!

Then, Moss dominates for three years, until the Patriots do, what they always do, and that's not pay players what they are worth, and if they don't like it, too bad! Hit the bricks!

Randy being happy because he is winning, Tom Brady will not be smiling for the next 12 games of the season, he will REALLY miss his boy!

It is not a coincidence that he was sent back to Minny. Favre has been a Big Moss Man fan for years, and you have to believe that even if he didn't know about the deal, management had him in mind when pulling the trigger.

Favre has been unable to do much with his number one target Sydney Rice out with a hip injury, Percey Harvin battling constant migraines, and no chemistry with Bernard Berrian. All the guy had was Porn Star in training Visanthe Shianco.

Click on the the little Viking hiding Shianco's BIG surprise for the full porno story.

So now here we are, and I am soooooo incredibly excited for this deal. First of all, New England will now have to try to figure out how they are going to win, when Wes Welker is getting all of Randy's sloppy second double coverages.  I would not be surprised if the Patriots don't make the playoffs after this deal.

The Vikings on the other hand, just punched a ticket to playoff town. Favre finally has the deep threat that he has been sorely lacking, and when teams do double cover Moss, that will open up the running game for Adrian Peterson, as well as the second and third options like Shianco and Harvin.

So I asked my Maestro of Bloganomics aka Blogatron how I should finish this one up, and his exact words were "BOLD PREDICTIONS ARE FUN.  Maybe Brady gets crunched so hard a couple times waiting for an option, he starts making excuses that his easy breezy flow is getting in his eyes.....so he shaves his head so he can see the field better. 

That or the Pats find someone to replace Moss. Maybe its the bills turn to get ripped of and Lee Evans comes The Pats way for a couple turtle burgers and a 6th rounder.  But nobody trades within their division right? No ok, but still.  Steve Smith to New England from the struggling Panthers for a pile of bricks, a 5th rounder and maybe a deep depth chart player like Slater."

No better way to end a blog, than the wise words of Blogatron, how can I top that?

This weeks podcast will be a very nice time:

- The Angry Dragon will be back

- We will have another Vodka shot challenge

- Breaking News in the rec hockey world, as the Flamingos sign two BIGTIME studs, we'll let you know who they are.

- Women's International Basketball is looking at shorter shorts, and shorter nets

- Baseball playoffs, football talk, and the NHL is back baby! All that and more is coming up on show three of Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast

Check it out by clicking here: http://kyleandgary.podbean.com/

Finally, a song that was in my head all day today, a little Thanksgiving treat from me to you!

Click here for the jam!

Have a great Thanksgiving long weekend everyone! Codeboner, make it 13 beotch!

Another Special Interview With Another Real Nice Guy.... Shane Endicott.

Every now and then, I like to catch up with my friends around the world. We had a great time talking to my buddy Mike Garnett. 

Well this week, I decided we should take a little trip to the land of wine and Spaghetti Westerns , Italy! What's in Italy you ask? Well it's not what, but who, and the answer is Shendo, AKA Shizzane, AKA Endovaschlong, AKA Endo, AKA King of the Angry Beetle. 

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give to you, an interview with Center for the SG Pontebba of the Italian Serie A league in Italy...... Shane Endicott.

G - So how the heck is Italy?

S - Hey bud,  Italy is pretty cool.   I've been having some fun and playing some good hockey.

G - Any funny stories from your first month or so there?

S - Ya, there is a few. Driving through the mountains with a guy on my team who just learned how to drive a manual transmission car.  If a deer would've stepped out, I'm not sure who would have been more caught in the headlights.  There would've been lots of revving the engine, clutch , gear changes , grinding gears,  windshield wipers , brights,  brake, maybe some ac , and sweat.  

We were at the casino, and the whole time he was suggesting that someone else maybe should drive. we  caught on to why he was suggesting that when he red lined it in the parking lot then stalled. He was good at steering though.

Endo thinking "Did I just sign with Nashville???? What was I thinking??"

G - How is the hockey going, I see you are 1 and 2, not to bad?

  
S - Ya, we are 1-2.  One decent game and two terrible ones.   The hockey is pretty fast.  Its always hard to compare the level of leagues, especially in only three games .  But the level does seem pretty good

G - How many points? I tried looking for the stats, but it being Italy and all, not even them google translates could help me out.

S - I have 3 assists in 3 games so far..  

  

The good ol days in Pittsburgh

G - What is your drink of choice out there? I imagine it being Italy and all, maybe Wine? Don't worry, I won't judge you, I know how hard as fack you are, as in drinking freebies, no big deal.

S - Oh the drinking. the guys drink mostly local tap beer, digestive shots after meals, and fruity shots when getting after it.  i try to keep it situational, but i like to sip on coronas and tequilas.

G - What do you do for fun out there? Angry beetles? Skiing? pizza making?

S - I'm not allowed to ski (injuries), or eat too much pizza ( fat testing) or angry beetle (crazy gay), but i have seen a few things. i have been working pretty hard since i got here. 

Going two a days for most of the week.  i haven't had very much time off to see things, but,  on my afternoons off, i like to go to vilach austria, udine italy, or slovakia casino, or one of the local ski resorts.  These places are all within 50 kms of me.  On one of my days off I went to this crazy street festival in Gorizzia, it was a nice time. I also spent some time in venice this year.  

Click the here to see an episode of Cribs, starring Endo and Colby Armstrong.

G - Give me a really funny story.

S - I've played the song Endicott by Kid Creole and the coconuts  at least once a day in the locker room.  I took the teams music memory stick and made the endicott song play 4 times out of every 100 songs. The guys really seem to like it!  sometimes i hear the young guys singing it under there breath in practice.

Click here for the unbelievable video. Seriously, radical stuff.

G - Since you are gone, and Endoland Ranch is vacant, can I take girls back there and tell them it's my place?

S - I dont think its going to be vacant this year. i had a request for someone to move in and my bro said he would collect rent, and keep up on maintenance for a portion of what i make. but , otherwise, game on. 

G - Anything else you want to say to the people back home?

S - I miss everyone like usual!!! see ya marchish.

Click here to see his first NHL goal, it's awesome! A shorty, against the Habs, in Montreal, with an apple from Mark freaking Recchi.

So there you have it! All in all, I think that was a pretty good interview, thanks to Shane for giving me some time, that was fun. I think our next interview with be with Toronto Maple Leaf, Colby Armstrong, so keep an eye out for that in the next month or so.

Face Bookers looking for a neat time, can find it by clicking the beautiful man below.

Soooooo Sexy!

Podcast number two will be recorded tomorrow after the Rider game, should be awesome. Word on the street is there will be a couple of special guests....... Angry Dragons anyone?

Have a great weekend.

 

This weeks podcast can be found here: http://kyleandgary.podbean.com/

Pretty hilarious stuff, for a rundown of what went on this week, check the official Podcast description area, right below this blog post!