Now the last time I went on a football trip was a couple of years ago, and I did a timeline of the trip, ( you can check that out here , and here ) and talked about all the fun stuff that happened, so let's see if we can't do that again!
So now, for your reading pleasure, or, in the case of most people who read this blog, to help you waste some time at work, I give to you "Gary's Drunken Recollection Of His Miami Trip..........Which May Or May Not Be Totally True!?".
Thursday Nov 11
6 am - Shawn and his beautiful wife Ash pick me up, I'm possibly still drunk from the previous night, flight leaves at 8, sooooo tired.
8 am - On the plane, thank goodness I brought these two game boys. Right now, playing Zelda, A Link to the Past for the Game Boy Advance, I know, Awesome.
9 am - Game change, time for some Contra on OG, aka the Original Game boy.
9:45 am - Count Cockula demands some Contra action, and if I have ever learned anything in lfe, I have learned when the Count demands something, you give it up, or else he'll try to teach you how to count, with his little count, guess it's back to the land of Hyrule.
11:00 am - Moment of Silence for the Troops, thank you for all that you have done, and continue to do.
5 ish pm Miami Time - I forgot where we stopped for a connecting flight on the way, Chicago..... maybe...... either way, I can tell you that I almost beat that dick Ganon in Zelda, he is freaking tough man....... oh yeah, I'm in Miami Bitch! Arya and I immediately head straight to the closest bar in the airport, two shots, and two Coronas..... here we go.
5:45 ish pm- "Hey, that guy looks famous!" Someone says as we walk towards the taxi stand. There's a sign that says Willie Parker........ Whisky Tango Foxtrot, "Willie Parker!!! Sweet" No one talks to him, he doesn't even have a team right now..... so who really cares........ but still, celeb sighting!!! If I was a girl, I would have totally seduced the shit out of him.
6 ish pm - Get in a van, with some gals from Dallas, and a gal from Pittsburgh. They say "Where ya'll from?" I proudly say "Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada!" They say "What??" Then I tell them about my Igloo and pet Polar Bear named Count Cockula. Very nice. Silly Americans, but seriously, super hot.
7 ish pm - Arrive at our hotel, and wow, no tables or chairs in the room, just two beds for me and the Count, and a bathroom that smells like some real dirty sex acts just went on in their prior to our arrival........ We're going to need some booze.
8 ish pm - Off to Finnegan's to watch the Heat - Celtics game, and to watch the Ravens lose me money.... thanks to Pistol Pete and his not so lucrative picks..... Hey look, it's the Iceman Chuck Lidell!! He looks really sore, still neat to see, once again, no one says anything, he looked like he was in a hurry, and I know I'm drunk, but was he wearing a fanny pack?? Better ask El Dandy.
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| Yep, that's the Iceman working out naked. I was looking for a funny picture of him, and once I saw this, I had to use it right? |
11:07 ish pm - We arrive at the I Heart Liquor store, and proceed to buy two 66's, one of Pomegranate Vodka, and one of Brugal Rum.......... 60 dollars.......... nice, turns out the store is open until midnight..... take note Canada!
Friday the 12th
12 am ish - Everyone is passed out, the Count looks at me, and doesn't need to say a word, off to the Ballet for some local entertainment.
1:30 ish am - Madonna's........ NICE!!
2 ish am - Very Talented, I never knew being called Papi could be so neat!
3 am - Me and The Count Fall asleep while listening to Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast, those guys are hilarious.
9 am - Wake up time, Pomegranate Vodka and Gatorade, breakfast of champions.
2 pm ish - Off to the beach! I wonder what feeling sober feels like.......... HOLY CRAP!!! Look at that, that girls got no top on.......... WOW. This is the best beach ever..... Let's play some football.
3 pm - I hear the Count's snap count "One...... Topless Girl..... AH AH AH..... Two..... Topless Girl....... AH AH AH........ HUT!"
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| Count Cockula at the line of scrimmage! |
7 pm - Supper time, Mojitos and Miller Lights and hot girls, oh my!
11 pm - I feel like I've been here before........... there's something about this place that looks familiar......... oh yeah, were back at Madonna's again, the best night club in town, everyone is sooooo friendly.
Just like last time, this blog got too long already, so we are going to have to split it into two parts again. What is going to happen?
Will the boys make it to the Heat - Raptors game, or even better, make it home?
Will they end up back at the beach where an injury almost ruined a great time?
Will they get on the Jumbo Tron at the Dolphins game, while doing the Wisniewski?
Check in next week to find out.
Want to join the fan page? No? Ok...... well if you change your mind, click on the sexy piece of man meat right over there!
Coming up on Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast this weekend:
SUPER AWESOME SHOW NUMBER 7
- We unveil the NEW THEME SONG, produced and recorded in Toronto by The Abyss and Gigs
- Mike Vick talk, best in the league....... I think so
- Listener Email, Listener Email!!!!!!
- Should Kobe Bryant be fined or suspended for being in the new COD commercials?
- NHL talk
All that plus SOOOOOOOOOO much more, you would be crazy not to check it out.
On that note, have a great weekend....... Trojan Horse, Take Me Home!!!
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