An Interview With The Captain Of Last Years Silkamatic Classic Champions, The Skinflutes

So the Second Annual Silkamatic Classic is coming up,  (Next Saturday, March 5th) and if you are asking yourself, "Self, what the fack is the Silkamatic Classic? And why is Gary so darn handsome?" First off, I am handsome because I treat my body like an amusement park, and the Silkamatic Classic is one of the greatest shinny tournaments in all of Saskatchewan.

I tracked down the captain of last years Tourney Champions, The Skinflutes..... Ladies and Gentleman, I give you, Scott McQueen:

So Scott, First off, tell me how your year went as Champion of the First Annual Silkamatic Classic? Lost of people buy you drinks, women, free hockey gear? Anyone throw you a parade?

I kissed thousands of babies, made babies,  shook hands with local celebrities, drank free at local watering holes, neighbors shoveled my walk for me. So my life hasn’t changed much since the win.

I couldn't find a picture of the real Scott McQueen, so this is a Scott McQueen Dog Sledding, or is it Sleighing?

How are the Skin Flutes looking this year? Do they have a shot at repeating

This question is an insult! Next question!

Here's a Scott McQueen at an I Dream Of  Jeanie Party

 What kind of training have you and the boys been doing to prepare yourselves for this very prestigious event?

 We stick to things we are good at. We make babies, drink, & laugh at the competition from last year, lot’s of laughter builds a strong core.  We have talked about the effort level we will need to put in to this years cup run.  We have decided as a team around 18% will do for this year’s title. That’s a 10% increase from last year.

Scott McQueen, The Jeweler

Which team do you think has a chance to make some noise this year?

 Who cares. Last year all the teams were loud when it came to complaining about the domination that took place.  I don’t feel that any team other than the Skin Flutes has a chance.  I have heard team’s will be gunning for us but we will shut them down and then shut their women down from attempting to play one of our Flutes! 

Here's a picture of a Scott McQueen at the Trumpy Picnic in Brevoort  park, circa 2008!

Anything you would like to add at all?

We may have lost our team “Meat” this year. He has moved to Swift and we are still hoping to have him back.  If he can’t return we are holding try-outs for around six thousand hopefuls with a couple of guys at the top of the list.  We are also looking to add some ethnicity to our squad so if Jeremy “hurt people” Rondeau can’t commit we will be looking to add a new dimension to our team. 

The Skin Flutes would like thank Greg along with all Tournament organizers for putting on an  awesome event that we will again dominate in both hockey & looks. 

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So there you go, isn't that Scott a great guy! Seriously, if you google image Scott McQueen, all those pictures come up! 


So what is going on with Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast this week?

Episode 19 - The Double Joe - Yzerman, Johnny Toews Show

Email us anytime at hot_to_trot101@hotmail.com

- Listener of the week, Scott Anderson asks the gang "What is the plan for the Rock at Wrestlemania??", while another email from Allisonial Footsoldier asks us a Math problem, that we can't really figure out........ Miggy Cabrera is charged with ANOTHER DUI, this time chuggin Scotch in front of the cops, in his car, while pulled over..... C'mon man!...... Cavs beat the Lakers, what's the bigger story, Cavs losing streak snapped, or the Lakers losing to the Cavs?....... Dale Jr. gets screwed in Daytona...... Richard Seymour will be the highest paid defensive player if the NFL goes to Lock Out town....... NC State's C.J. Leslie's Valentines day poem about hooking up is Gary's Shitty Impression of the week..........

- A girl wins a boys wrestling match, by default, because of the boys beliefs........... Tommy Morrison says HIV doesn't exist, so he has unprotected sex every day!............ Nintendo blackmail attempt ends in handcuffs.......  Did Patrick Kane have a two day hangover, and miss a game because of it?? ....... Reggie Miller shows why the Basketball Hall Of Fame is dumb........ A New Vegas Arcade will be opened soon, with retro video games, and bottle service, AKA, AWESOME........ We have the stupidest News Report ever reported......... And the Top 50 Video Game Characters of All Time

- Myles Morrison brings us some Valentines Day humor, about balls and boobs......... Porno Parody party movie's -  Just Go With It, and I Am Number Four.

Community Bulletin Board Info:

The Second Annual Silkamatic Classic Shinny Tournament Info Page

http://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/event.php?eid=189233571100192

Check out my favorite Speaker Dancer's New Blog, it's AWESOME!!!

http://lindsayslocker.podbean.com/

 If you want to join the blog party, feel free to do so by clicking on the beautiful piece of Man Meat here:

So, until next week,  Trojan Horse says "That Silky has a pice of anatomy, just like mine!" See ya'll next week.

Gary's Five Best "Spitting" Moments In Sports

Tiger Woods is in the news again! For doing something that millions of people do around the world, all the time. What is it that has caused such a ruckus you ask? Did he take a fan into the port a potty, and give her the business in the middle of his round? Nope. Did he curse up a storm via Happy Gilmore? No again!

So what is it that Tiger has done that has the worlds media panties in a knot? He spat on the green....... yep, spat on the green. I do this all the time, so does everyone else I ever golf with, I don't know if that says more about the company I keep, or if it is just a common thing to do, but people spit all the time when they are outside!

Now I am not here to judge whether this is ok or not (We all know this is facking stupid right?!), I am here to put together another one of my now infamous lists, and we will call this one "Gary's List Of  His Five Favorite Spitting Moments In Sports"


"Keith Hernandez on Seinfeld"

This was hilarious. Click on the picture to see the full scene, but the just of it is, Jerry re enacts the JFK conspiracy theory, but with Hernandez as the "shooter". Seriously, watch it, it is fantastic.



Robbie Alomar Spits On Ump

Here is a description from guyism.com: 

"A called third strike in a 1996 game against the Blue Jays sent second baseman Roberto Alomar into a wild tirade. Umpire John Hirschbeck was the recipient of Alomar’s anger and while being separated, Alomar spit directly in his face. Alomar later defended his actions saying Hirschbeck had uttered a racial slur. MLB suspended him for five games the following season and Alomar was forced to issue a letter of apology to the umpire."

That's a pretty heavy thing to do man, spit on an umpire, but I bet every single ball player on the planet would love to do what Robbie did after a bad strike three call, so I see the motivation there..... then I thought of this:

AWESOME!!!

Tyson Spits Out An Ear

How can we not talk about the bite heard around the world. This happened during Tyson Holyfield Two, the rematch after Holyfield defeated Tyson in the first fight. Iron Mike was not about to lose again, so he decided to take matters into his own hands, or in this case, his own mouth. After getting worked in round 1, Tyson came out for round two, and proceeded to take a big ol' bite out of Evander's ear, then he spat it out. That makes for a pretty good Sports Spit moment if ya ask me!


Roseanne Barr Spits After Singing A Terrible Version Of The National Anthem

Just click on the picture to watch the video, and it pretty much explains everything.

Doctor Cue Performs The Ultimate Spit Shot

The Maestro Of Bloganomics sent me this one, and since I love pool trick shots more than I love seeing naked babes eating bacon during the Super Bowl......(I know, THAT MUCH!) This has to be on the list.

So there you have it, some nice little sports spitting moments for you to enjoy.


Well nothing much left to say, except I wonder what happened on Kyle And Gary's Super Awesome Podcast  this week?

 Episode 18 - The Sasha Vujacic

Email us anytime at hot_to_trot101@hotmail.com

- Barry Bonds is finally getting ready to go to trial, do you care?.......... Listener of the week Jeff Wickstrom asks a bout the Super Bowl and what Gary remembers of the first half.............. Ray Allen broke the NBA Three Point record, does that make him the best shooter of all time?.........  18 million dollars will be spent on repairing the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome, just in time for the Vikings to move to their NEW stadium next year........ Customs Workers destroy a 10 thousand dollar jersey, because they thought it was counterfeit?......... Harry Baals will not be the name of a new building, even though he is leading the vote to name the building by over 9 thousand votes? C'mon man!

- The NFL tries to fix their Super Bowl ticket drama.......... A Rod is angry that a Camera caught him getting fed popcorn by his girlfriend............. Fun Porno Parody Party movies - Just Go With It, The Roommate, and Cedar Rapids............ An online Gaming Marriage leads to a real life Criminal Charge....................One of Antonio Cromartie's Baby Momma is writing a tell all book........... Pittsburgh Penguin Mike Rupp does something awesome!......... A boy's Xbox spending spree makes his family broke!

As well, Comedian Myles Morrison talks about his small penis in this weeks "Minute With A Real Comedian!"

Community Bulletin Board Info:

The Second Annual Silkamatic Classic Shinny Tournament Info Page

http://www.facebook.com/#!/event.php?eid=256310942181

Check out my favorite Speaker Dancer's New Blog, it's AWESOME!!!

http://lindsayslocker.podbean.com/

 If you want to join the blog party, feel free to do so by clicking on the beautiful piece of Man Meat here:

So, until next week,  Trojan Horse says "That my friends, is some heavy Spit" See ya'll next week.

The Verno Super Bowl Party Recap......... I think?

So Super Bowl 45 went down on Sunday, and I was of course at the Olson household, with about 40 of my closest friends, it was sooooooo much fun, I decided to share a time line of the day with you (or at least what I think I remember), and here we go.

10:30 am - I get a phone call from Verno, saying it's time for brunch. This would be just fine, if it weren't for my brother showing up at my house the night before, after we recorded Episode 17 of Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast. We proceeded to finish the Slava vodka, plus some Crown Floats (For my boy The Abyss), so needless to say, the thought of this early start was very intimidating.

11:30 am - I show up at Mur and Shir's place, to a beautiful spread of fruit and breakfast sandwiches, if anything will help the hangover, this is it right? Shir offers me some coffee, now I don't normally drink coffee, but I decided to make a special exception..... since there was a bottle of Baileys on the table, a half and half should start the day off right!

The only way to start Super Bowl Sunday, and the Mangler Cup!

 12:30 pm - Stevie, Verno, Sven and me eagerly await the arrival of Count Cockula, knowing that once he gets there, it is time to crack open the Texas Mickey....... and indulge in the fantasticness of Super Bowl Sunday! Verno tells me he is a little bit intimidated at the sight of the bottle, I tell him to stop being a pussy, we do this every year, no big deal, just take it one shot at a time man!

12:45 pm - Count Cockula arrives!!!! Oh momma, we are all systems go! The honorary shot takes place, how many ounces Count Cockula? "One ounce, ah ah ah, two ounce, ah ah ah!" Very big!

Count Cockula, count shots....... That's alot of shots!

1:30 pm - Rum doesn't mix well with Grape G2, better just chug it to get it out of the way. Time to start bumping some tunes, get this party started, what better way to do that than a little Baltimora!!!!

(Click the pic for the Song!)

2:30 pm - The rest of the party is starting to arrive, nice to see all the old faces, oh wow, look over there, that Texas Mickey is over half gone! Good for us, I better have a stiff one to make sure the rum hasn't gone bad.

2:33 pm - The Rum is still good, very potent, should have mixed that one, but what's this? Pineapple juice has arrived, my favorite juice, this could be a game changer!

2:37 pm - Mix a rum and pine..... yep! Game Changer.

3:30 pm - Man, the party is really bumping now, what a great, fantastic time, I think I will eat something, WOW, there is a lot of food here, better stick to the dry ribs!! Man those are good!

3:40 pm - Sorry everyone, I didn't mean to eat all the dry ribs, but they are so good, I feel tired. Hey look, it's El Dandy and Big C from Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Podcast fame. Hi guys, look at how much Rum I drank!

4 pm - I think mes needs another drank!!! Oh oh? The Mickey Texas is gonzo???? What happened???

4:30 pm - Look, it's my favorite couple on the planet Paul and Emily........ Emily looks smoking hot, as always, a little bit big though, I better ask her why she's so fat.

4:32 pm - Em's Pregnant, and for the record, never ask girls why they are so fat! That a boy Pauly! Congrats you two, I love you.

5:30 pm - Kick off baby!! I am going to just cuddle up in front of the TV here, looks like a nice spot, I am pretty sure I am not in the way of any of the 40 or so people here, alright, FOOTBALL!

5:31 pm - ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

7 pm - Wow, looks like I fel asleep for a couple seconds, why is there garbage all around me, what happened here? Someone must have drugged my rum..... "WHO DRUGGED MY RUM!!!" That's it!!  I better just drink Count Cockula's beer, you are never safe from those date rape drugs.

9 pm - What a boring Super Bowl, a real snoozer if you will. Time to go to El Dandy's place to listen to some podcast, and enjoy a nice little night cap.

Midnight - Time for bed, I can't wait for work tomorrow, it will be sooooooo fun.......... facking Super Bowl.

Well nothing much left to say, except I wonder what happened on Kyle And Gary's Super Awesome Podcast  this week?

Episode 17 - The Wendel Clark

Email us anytime at hot_to_trot101@hotmail.com


- In this weeks episode, Our listener of the week Chris "The Mandingo Warrior" Cotton asks the panel about Terry Bradshaw's sanity.......... We talk about our picks for the NFL Defensive Playr of the Year....... Mickey Mantle filled out a survey, very lewdly, and this brought upon this week's Gary's Shitty Impression of the Week..........  Milf of the year candidate Diamond Foxxx is going to pleasaure a big line up of men if the Steelers win the super bowl............ Goalie FIGHT!!!.......................

- Man gets penis tattooed for free mini cooper ............ In Our Tech Segment, we talk about Ostrich skin controllers........... Vikings Cornerback plans to start a porn site, neat!..................... OJ Mayo says an energy drink was the reason for his failed drug test???? C'mon Man!.............. Kevin Garnett once again prooves that he is a real asshole!!........ The Stanley Cup game 6 game winning puck is lost, 50 G's if you find it, and the FBI is also on the case........ Kevin Durant Calls out Chris Bosch for being a pussy!.......

*****Also a new segment******  "A minute with a real comedian!" Makes it's debut, starring Myles Morrison.

If you want to join the blog party, feel free to do so by clicking on the beautiful piece of Man Meat here:

So, until next week,  Trojan Horse says "I love Super Bowl Sunday, The Olson's are so Awesome!!" See ya'll next week.

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year!!

It's that time of year again. You know, the only time it's OK to get black out drunk on a Sunday. For me, it's also the only time of the year that I allow myself to let a Texas Mickey wrap it's big, beautiful arms around me, and slowly rock me to sleep ........ that's right, it's Super Bowl Weekend!!!

I will again be heading over to Mur and Shurs place, the wonderful parents of my oldest friend, the Big Vern. This has become probably my favorite tradition in my life, next to family Christmas, and of course, The Mangler Cup (It's had to believe that me and Count Cockula will have to defend our Championship in only 3 months!!!) I have already covered the awesomeness of that party RIGHT HERE.

Gary and Count Cockula celebrating their Mangler Cup Victory!

So enough of that, let's get down to the nitty gritty. The Pittsburgh Steelers and the Green Bay Packers will meet in Dallas on Sunday, for what is sure to be a boring snoozefest of a Super Bowl. We have been treated to some REALLY good games the last couple of years ( I still don't think Santonio Holmes's other foot has touched the ground, my poor Cards!!) but I think that streak comes to an end.

Are those feet in???

NOPE, there's the evidence! My poor Cards!!

The only good thing I can see coming out of this match up, is Ben Roethlisberger possibly winning his third Super Bowl Ring. Now I don't like Big Ben at all, never have, and ever since his alleged rape charges came up, I really started to dislike him, but if he wins that third ring, I am hoping people will put him up there with Tom Brady, and then maybe people will start to say "Brady isn't that good, I mean, Roethlisberger has three rings, and he is an asshole/ alleged rapist, shitty quarterback....... "

This guy and Tom Brady, two peas in a pod right!

The game itself will be boring, the Steelers running game will run, but not up the middle, since their Pro Bowl Center Maurkice Pouncey will not play. The Packers Passing game will pass, but not deep, thanks to Troy Polamalu...... things are shaping up here to be a real stinker!

Ladies and gentleman..... ok, mostly ladies, here is your Super Bowl MVP!

So, with all that said, here are my predictions for what's going to happen on Sunday:

- I don't know who, but I know a defensive player will win the MVP, either Clay Matthews, Troy Polamalu, or my boy out of Michigan, the only Steeler I like, Lamar Woodley. So out of those three, I do think that Green Bay is going to win this game, which means that Matthews will win the MVP (how's that for a fearless prediction?)

- Number of drinks consumed by Gary - 39

- Final Score Green Bay 10 - Pittsburgh 7

So there you have it, nothing left to do but the drinking...... Speaking of drinking, what happened on Kyle And Gary's Super Awesome Podcast  this week?

Episode 16 - The Joe Montana

Email us anytime at hot_to_trot101@hotmail.com


- First ever back to back listener of the week Will Stuart asks about the Royal Rumble, so we bring in an expert, Big C  from Sharp Shootin with Big C joins us to do a preview of the Royal Rumble........ Does this soccer celebration deserve a fine?....... Wes Welker regrets his HILARIOUS feet speech....... Mike Vick gets hi first post prison endorsement, isn't it about time?........ The NHL All Star Weekend, did you like the Fantasy Draft?.........  Man takes a poop in a store, steals candy, leaves his dirty undies and yells at some school children........ Carlos Boozer gets busted for cheating  with a chick from the Bachelor....... Is it cool to have a "Virtual Girlfriend"?........  Fan attacks player over shared girlfriend.......  UFC 126 preview.................. EA sports is in trouble after commentator gets fired for sexist remarks............... NFL draft eligible player, Will Hill has his twitter hacked, and hilarity ensues!

Also we unveil our NEW Weekly Segment Intros, including "What's in the Fridge", Gary's Shitty Impression Of The Week", "Our Fun Porno Parody Party" , "4 Minute Shot" , "Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Movie Of The Week", "Kyle and Gary's Super Awesome Listener of the Week", and "Our Tech Segment!".

Thanks to our Random Hot Girl for voicing the Intros, they sound really nice.

If you want to join the blog party, feel free to do so by clicking on the beautiful piece of Man Meat here:

So, until next week,  Trojan Horse says "I love Super Bowl Sunday, The Olson's are so Awesome!!" See ya'll next week.